The King (Of the Broom Cupboard) and I

Back in the 80s I used to watch a lot of TV. Now, I only watch [H]ouse. Then I watched everything, taped everything, watched everything over again.

After school, I would get myself some toast and honey, or Ricicles and a hot chocolate and settle down to the TV: Blockbusters, Grange Hill, The Flintstones, Neighbours…

When the BBC took the genius decision to have their first visible continuity announcer I couldn’t have been more pleased:  they gave us Phillip Schofield.

He worked in the “broom cupboard” of the BBC and linked the shows with such skill and wit that I used to video the continuity links and watch them on repeat, rather than the shows. So refreshing.

Phillip seemed to find things genuinely funny and laughed along with his audience rather than in a patronising way. And Gordon the Gopher was hilarious.

So, maybe you had to be there. Wait, til I check YouTube. OK here’s a clip that got him an award for pressing the wrong button:

Anyway, Phillip moved on to many other things – leaving us with the… not quite so groundbreaking and compelling likes of Andy Crane and Andi Peters.

Unsurprisingly, it turned out he was multi-talented, and multi-coloured, once they gave him his technicolour dreamcoat and a mic.

About ten years after the broom cupboard, he was treading the boards as Joseph. I went to see him in Edinburgh.

At the end of the night he took a collection for an AIDS charity. He said that you could get a kiss for a fiver. I duly borrowed the fiver from whatever young man I was with, headed down the front and gave him the fiver. He said, and I quote, “Ooh, a fiver!” and gave me a kiss.

He’s still brilliant, but I don’t watch any of his shows.

I only watch [H]ouse.